Loneliness
We have all experienced it at some point in our lives - but what exactly is loneliness? Simply put, it's the feeling that you lack the social connections you need. However, its emotional impact might sound like:
“Everyone is having fun apart from me”
“I feel like I don't have any meaningful relationships”
“Nobody needs me”
“I feel like nobody knows the real me”
“Everyone's lives are more fulfilling than mine”
“I feel like I don't have anyone to share my joys with"
Even in crowds of familiar people, we can still feel lonely – our minds feel dissociated from others and society. It's ironic that when we feel lonely, most of us tend to act in ways that make us feel even lonelier. Loneliness becomes a cycle, eroding our self-esteem, convincing us we're unlikeable, heightening our sensitivity to rejection, and fuelling our desire to withdraw.
To break free from this cycle, we must learn to recognise and address the early signals of loneliness. When those signals arise, our instinct should be to seek connection. But here's the twist: it's not just about widening our social circles or joining new groups. Research suggests that it's the quality, not the quantity, of our relationships that truly makes a difference. And to improve that quality, we must embrace vulnerability and share our true selves. It’s not about how many followers we have on Socials, or how many friends we have on platforms, it’s about maximising our time with the people in our lives that bring out the best in us.
Sure, vulnerability isn't easy. It might mean opening up to your partner about feeling down, reaching out for help when needed, or honestly communicating with a friend about something they did that bothered you. Despite the fear of rejection, vulnerability is crucial for building intimate connections and transparency with our feelings. There is no shame in saying you feel lonely – this is simply stating there feels to be something missing from your life at that time. When we hide our true selves, we risk feeling unseen, unknown, and ultimately, even lonelier.
So, if you ever find yourself battling loneliness, remember this: as humans, we're wired for connection. It's through the courage to be authentic that we pave the way for genuine intimacy and forge deep, meaningful bonds with others. Think about who you value in your life, which interpersonal relationship promotes your well-being, and mental health?