Reparenting
So many individuals are raised in homes where our parents do not meet our emotional, or physical needs. This has long-lasting effects on an individual’s self esteem, and self-worth. Being kind to ourselves and prioritising our own wellbeing becomes something that is disregarded, and avoided. Many clients I meet find priortising their own wellbeing uncomfortable, as it isn’t something that was necessarily encouraged when they were a child. As children, we subconsciously seek the love, security and emotional warmth our parents and caregivers - when this isn’t given, it can have lasting effects going through adulthood.
Although we cant go back to change our childhood experience, we can become a kind parent to ourselves and relearn how to self-care, love, accept and protect ourselves. We do this through small, daily practices that eventually build up to a normal routine and mindset. It takes time, but eventually you will start to notice an improvement in your perspective of yourself.
This is what we call reparenting.
To restore the sense that we are loveable, and deserving of care and affection, we can take part in any of the following practices implementing them slowly into our week. We can start to build up the sense that it’s OK to express creativity, and feelings. We does this through Nurture, Self-Protection and Play. These can be:
Reparenting through Nurture
- Journaling
- Having an early night
- Decluttering space, and tidying around us
- Wearing clothes we feel comfortable in (a favourite in my household!)
- Making a nourishing meal – if it feels overwhelming changing your diet entirely, opt for introducing this one day a week to begin with
- Keeping on top of GP, and Dental Appointments
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Reparenting through Self Protection
- Being assertive and maintaining boundaries
- Expressing your preference – start small if this feels daunting
- Telling the ones that hurt us the way they made us feel
- Ending an unhealthy relationship
- Unfollowing accounts on social media that damage us
- Keeping mindful of the food we intake
- Consider the types of programmes you watch on TV
Reparenting through Play
- Jigsaws and Puzzle Solving
- Colouring
- Art Classes
- Listening to music, or making it
- Playing board games with people we are comfortable with
- Crafting
If you feel you struggle to prioritise yourself, and doubt yourself very easily, have you considered speaking to a therapist about the causes of this? Talking therapies can help us understand each individuals subjective experience, and look at ways to move forward, at your pace and in an environment you feel comfortable in.